sometimes...

12:31 PM

images from Easter brunch with the Chessey's
you know. i've really just about had it with today, and it's only 9 am. 

for one, I am really, really (let me emphasize that again with another - really) getting tired of the business practices at my day job. but I guess that's not really new. today though was just A LOT to handle. I need to learn to not take it personal but if i do leave here. i'm sort of embarrassed to be associated with the company. It wasn't always this way. But lately..A LOT lately

second, i dont know why i even bother to read political debates and especially, their comments. it gets my blood boiling, i tell you. the nerve of some people when they have NO CLUE and just think it's an easy fix or  whatever it maybe without fully knowing what the situation, laws and all, are about. and then to use a group of people as scapegoats - and im sorry but, sometimes it starts to sound a little hitler-ish. seriously. 

anyway. in other news, i've been catching up on editing some past galleries but some people don't realize that  it takes a long time to edit and actually receive images. for paying clients, i always try and deliver before the target 2-3 week goal and will usually deliver within a week of the session and a blog post within a day or two. but when i had my portfolio building shoots where in exchange for the work all the talent is providing, we put in time, talent and exchange images and experience instead of bucks, but because of life and my other jobs, i haven't been able to deliver to a couple of the models from one session. i have completed what i had edited and used for my portfolio and did give the link to that, but i havent gone thru the remainder of the 1000 images. And I know i should just edit away and deliver those because i owe it to them to. besides, i am only about 1-2 weeks behind (which is really like 3-4 weeks in total - which egads, is pretty bad. sorry) on that note- I just need to lock myself in the office and do it already. The thing is, I feel like the just think- you shoot the images, and then you give those images and thats it, but thats not it. even if you get everything right straight out of the camera (sooc) there still needs to be some editing done - for one, i shoot in raw...anyway, this is an entirely different post altogether..i wanted to rant. so rant i did..bleh

so in real news, day 2 of the share the bedroom project with the kids is going well - at least for me. i had our king sized bed all to myself again last night, while it looks like charlie ended up at the foot of Jax's bed again. as i got ready this morning, i let them sleep. isn't that nice of me? but before i left, jax did wake up so i got to give him some unwanted snuggles and kisses.

raima woke up again in the middle of the morning and cried this time while heading to our bedroom. we nursed of course and snuggled for a bit before charlie took her back to her room. all of it started to sink in actually and thoughts of having a third little one snuck into my head. after all, they wont be little for long, i thought. sigh. if only it were that simple and money were no object or life's responsibilities werent so daunting sometimes.

anyway, i had this hairbrained idea that i threw out to charlie last night, while we got to sit together and cuddle (read: connect) while we watched tv without the kidlets (one great thing now that the share the bedroom project has taken place). i thought, hey let's buy a used rv/trailer that is part rv and part food truck and have our own food truck race. we'll travel with the kids, meet people and provide fun and food and take pictures and blog about it along the way! the money we make from the stay at a particular city would get us to the next city and we would survive off of the road trip this way. we'd blog about it and live as nomads. frankly, the more i think about it the more awesome it starts sounding. oh wait, but first we need to have money. right right. you think i could get a kickstarter started for it? HA! man, that's like all sorts of dreams imagined and realized all rolled up into one. sigh, if that could actually happen. we could homeschool or road school for the most part but if we did it now, and for only a few years we could easily enroll the kids in public school ..anyway, i need to pull myself down back to earth, i know.

ok..back to the grind..rant over.

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3 comments

  1. I can totally relate to working at a place that doesn't align with your values. I'd actually expect shady business practices if I worked for a big corporation, but my experience was with a small non-profit. It was soul-sucking (to say the least). There was a light at the end of the tunnel for me, so it kept me there until I got to that light. If I didn't have that dangling in front of me, I doubt I would have lasted much longer (I put up with it for 3 years). I hope things get better for you.

    As for being exhausted by 9am - I feel like that's every day of my life.

    I'm being a total bummer here, but wanted to let you know that you're definitely not alone.

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  2. All over the place! That's what I love about you. Wait til Charlie gets his degree. Then we'll buy a Westfalia and follow you down the road. I say we hit up all the surf spots, Brett can surf, write code at night, Charlie can feed the surfers and educate the younglings. And you and I can write, write, write! And get tan. :D

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    Replies
    1. I totally am all over the place! Shows how my brain is most of the time..bleh..anyway - YES - lets do it!!! :)

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